shameless love

what if I could EXUDE pure love and joy in the office?

but how?....I lack the courage to speak, and when I do muster some boldness to say a word ...it's always something that doesn't make much sense or have any of the resonating effects I will them to. My actions are "kindly" but nothing outstanding. I made cupcakes and brownies, but even that felt illusory. It didn't take root from my heart, I thought it did, but after a more in depth and careful examination of my intentions I felt deluded.

my bosses are always so "busy", I want to pull them aside and tell them with ALL MY HEART that they are loved by a GREAT and PERFECT God! and then hug them and turn the office into one big party of smiles, grateful hearts, and lights.

I want to be salty.

I want to think in terms of eternity and not just the day to day.

I want to be able to love more.

I want to have courage!

I want to not be afraid of trusting.

I want to BE loved.

I want to be crazy in love with Jesus!

I want to know that I can do anything!

I want to sing without getting nervous

I want to be able to open up to people

I want to listen better, empathize better

I want to work hard for the sake of being salty rather than for money

I want to take on an adventure!

sigh, it must be that time of the month...where the truth can be suppressed no more.

this is difficult, and sort of painful to swallow, but I will keep running.

goodnight.

brazilian coffee

who knew I was missing out on something so ...so...what's the word?...exquisite! yes! very much so, my taste buds hug every drop that tickles my tongue!

sweet and lovely with a hint of nutty! mmm. and perfectly brewed to just the right flavor, even the temperature is something I savor!

haha. okay, enough jibberish. jibberish. what an exquisite word! bahahaha...the world lights up! Perhaps it was the massage I got today for 20 dollars. Something so amazing for such a deal can only put one in high spirits!

and indeed in high spirits I needed to be.

a loof had me fooled, and carried away my stomach,
for three days straight like a lost sailor on deck!

the calm smell of brazilian coffee, smoothes out my senses and overtakes me.

here and there, was there, will be tomorrow, and then in a week; a year or maybe three we shall soon see!

till then here's a photo, simply adorable!

quiet in time.

take me to that place of loneliness,

folded hands and syncopated breaths of holiness

til I am alone, and nothing in this world makes a sound

Joy inside unending; what once was lost is now so completely found.

G R A C E ocean

challenging to obey,

seems as if I always fall short of Your glory

yet you still love me?

amazing grace.

the strange door

here it stands in front of me

cut from Nature's kindly tree

this new door it beckons me

but I am cautious of what might be.

My pulse beats go,

but my thoughts fear no,

pacing the floor

I can wait no more

the joy or pain that could be there

would be? should be? it seems unfair.

The solo act has left me bare,

Jesus lead me, I want to be your pair.

like a child she blooms

Waiting in the silent room,

clutching at her seamless clothes,

trembling with an awesome fear,

but fighting shadows deep and near

This is where You spoke to me,

this is where I was

this is where I wait again

for your reassuring love

small, weak; an ember barely there,

til you breathe life and peace

a strong wind rushing through the air

Silent and calm the storm becomes,

speechlessly overwhelmed as You call for me

only You can reach my deepest fears

and turn them into joyful tears

grateful, grateful

so very thankful.

Thankful, thankful,

let me never stop being grateful.

tall breath

The firm strength of a tree trunk,

the steadfast flow of a stream,

You bring me peace unending,

hold my quivering hands

Blinded I walk in circles,

till you lead me off the path,

uncertain, but full of hope

I am reminded of things past

how you blessed me, held me, loved me

and for that I take a tall breath.